Breathing deeply as he escaped evening chapel, Jake edged around the building, intent on heading around the back of the buildings towards the trees for a smoke. There were a few minutes before the call would go out for them to be in for the night, so he headed quietly out to where he normally went to when he needed it, rolling up his sleeves to his elbows before shoving his hands deep in his trouser pockets. His steps faltered slightly when he found someone else back there on the walk behind the houses, recognising the lean figure and the way he was balanced on the wooden rail along the path with his feet hooked on the next rail down - clearly Avery had had the same idea as he did. Smoke curled back over his shoulder in the breeze when he exhaled, a dirty grey against the clear blue of the quickly fading daylight.
They caught each other’s eyes and Avery’s widened a bit; for a spilt second he looked as if he might jump down from the rail, but then changed his mind. Jake didn’t stop walking until he was standing next to the other boy, pulling his own packet of cigarettes from a pocket along with his lighter and bending to lean against the rail.
“Hi,” he said with a glance up at Avery at the same time Avery said ‘Hello’ to him, and they both smiled, Avery letting out a short, almost nervous laugh before turning his gaze back to the trees in front him, the trees behind Jake. They said nothing else for a minute as Jake lit his fag, taking a long drag, and Avery finished his own, dropping it to the dirt to let it smoulder out on by itself.
A minute later they were talking quietly, almost automatically. Talking about nothing in particular – all Jake’s focus was all on how nice the other boy’s voice sounded and how warm he smelt next to him on the fence (faintly like smoke now and… soap maybe, a natural clean smell that was suddenly all Jake could smell), slouched as if awkward in their switched difference in height. He shifted his weight from foot to foot, looking up at Avery who was fiddling with his own lighter in his lap, and flushing as he realised how close he was next to him. With his forearms resting on the wooden rail, Jake was almost touching Avery’s thigh. Really, all he had to do was lean slightly more to the left… had he done this? Just now, or when he first leaned against the fence? Did Avery mind? Did he notice?
What would he do if I actually touched him? Jake thought, flicking his eyes to the slight curve of Avery’s waist.
He glanced back up at him and this time Avery caught his eye before Jake could turn back to look down at the grass on the other side of the fence, where he dropped the butt of his cigarette. He felt Avery’s eyes on his back as he watched lights start to flick on along the paths in the courtyard across the lawn.
When they spoke up after another long moment, it was at the same time again.
“Maybe we should head back,” Jake suggested, actually dreading the idea, as Avery said, “You want to walk a bit with me?” quietly. Avery said nothing in response to Jake; he just looked at him with those wide eyes of his and then quickly back at the ground as he hopped off the rail. Jake flushed again under his gaze, glad for the shadows, replying with a quick ‘Yes’ that made Avery look up at him again.
When the smaller boy smiled up at him, Jake repressed the sudden overwhelming desire to reach out and brush his hair away from his eyes in order to see them better, lighting up in the way he imagined they would when he smiled like that. He promptly shoved that hand into his trouser pocket, smiling slowly back and falling into step with Avery as he led them away from their houses, the long way around the grounds. Conversation soon came quickly and easily, and neither of them seemed to notice or care how their arms brushed when they walked, so closely together, or just how slow they were actually walking. Because of it, they found themselves sneaking back outside of the lit walks, laughing quietly, goodnights quickly yet hesitantly whispered and smiled when they had to part.
Jake’s grin finally started to fade as he went up the steps to his own house and started up the inside staircase, finding himself wishing that he wasn’t alone in entering his dark and empty room.