Avery had been asleep, but that was before Jack started talking. Jack was still talking, and Avery could barely make out his face in the darkness. It must have been two in the morning, and Jack might not even have known that Avery was listening, but still he talked, and Avery listened hard to catch Jack's soft voice.
"I put you up on a pedestal, you know. I mean, I know you know. You know everything. No you don't. You don't, Avery. You aren't perfect and you aren't an angel, and I didn't mean to expect you to be. I don't really, and...fuck, is it wrong to think you're wonderful? I guess a wonderful person. Not perfect. You bite your nails sometimes...oh, Avery. I just don't--I guess that I forget sometimes. You're my best friend and boyfriend, lover, love of my life...I want to say soulmate. With you, I know what the rest of my life will be like. Not hiding from Mother, not messed up relationships. You and Jake and Annabelle and Missus--and...Claire. A future, such a beautiful one, as beautiful as you in a different way, so you do seem perfect, and you do seem like an angel with all of this that I maybe don't deserve. That's understandable, isn't it? So I'm just saying, I guess. I'm sorry if I've ever made you feel like less than who I think you are. I know you're real. You're warm and you smile and you cry and sometimes you mess up but Avery I still love you and I love you, not some idol to be worshipped because who wants an idol to worship when I can have a you to touch." Jack sighed and pillowed his head against his arm. He still wasn't looking at Avery. "That must sound really stupid."
Avery touched Jack's face, and couldn't tell from how Jack closed his eyes if he'd known he was listening. He didn't care. "It's not," Avery said, voice breaking a little. "It's exactly what I wanted to hear. Jack...it's perfect."
Jack laughed, choked on his laugh, and then hugged Avery hard. Avery couldn't tell if he was crying or not, but held him just the same.
And then they slept.