Dance Diary in December

---

December 1, 2001
How cool is this! I placed 1st at the November Webfeis! I got a shiny TROPHY! I'm also going to be participating in the WebOireachtas next weekend in the Light Competition, which is the Slip Jig, if my ankle is good enough. Turns out it was just sprained. There was a HAIR on my ankle that showed up and looked like a fracture. Faulty x-ray machine.
I'll be competiting in the Heavy Competition, which is the Hornpipe, in two weeks, and in three weeks, my Set, which has yet to be decided. I'd like to do The Blackbird, or King of the Fairies (which I LOVE) or St. Pat's, but I'd rather not, because I danced it at the last Webfeis.
Guess what! Andrea said she hung up because her aunt Sorcha's baby, Ryan, died! Andrea is extremely sad. Her family will be going to Northern Ireland to be with Sorcha and her husband. According to Andrea, Sorcha wasn't that great when she visited with Ryan a couple weeks ago. She talked on the phone the whole time! Just like my math teacher, Mrs. Rogers. She's always on the phone! It's very annoying.
They're still debating who's going and who's staying, I should know soon.
My school is designing a crest which will be placed on our school dresses. We don't have a design yet, but I'm thinking of many that could be possibilities.
I have saved the worst news for very very very last, so hang tight, diary.
I'm really worried about dancing in the WebOireachtas! What if my ankle breaks, or what if I can't participate?! I should stop worrying. It's a sprain, and I can walk fine on it, well, with some support with crutches. They're too small, and one of them is broken, so they are quite dangerous to use.
And now the worst news! AIOBH SPILLED MUSTARD ON MY SOLO DRESS!!!!!!! I'm going to go kill her!

December 6, 2001
My ankle is nearly healed, and the cast was removed (finally!) because all I need is a bandage. The crutches were put back in the closet after being fixed so that the next time -
Ah! Something just crashed. Must see what the fuss is all about.
You'll never believe this, but Aiobh has just fallen down the basement stairs. Mom and Da are out now, and Grand-Da and Grandmother Connelly are coming over to watch me, because Aiobh is going to the hospital. She's not in the Big O, so it's not as torturous if her leg or arm or anything is broken.
Grand-Da and Grandmother are here, and I'm going to show Grandmother my solo dress and see if she can't get the mustard stain out of it.
Oh, I forgot to mention! Grand-Da and Grandmother are in from Dublin this month because of the WebOireachtas! It's quite grand!
Grandmother got the stain out (after an hour of trying!) I'm quite pleased. But I have an extra class tonight. It's private because only Riana and I are attending, as we are going to be in the solo competitions this month, and we need to practice.
Siobhan says that if I wish to dance my new Hornpipe, I'd best practice it some more, otherwise I have to use my old one.

December 7, 2001
News! Auntie Aisling wrote from Dublin! So did Auntie Siofra and all ten of my aunts and uncles on my mom's side!
Auntie Aisling is nice, but she has seven kids who are the WORST! I mean the WORST! They always visit on the holidays, and all of my family is coming for Christmas! About thirty cousins, and nearly twenty-eight adults, not counting Grand-Da and Grandmother Connelly or Grandma Monaghan.
But Auntie Aisling's last visit with her children found seven vases broken, my cat's tail cut, whiskers fried, and our apple trees picked clean!
We have a new guesthouse so that they can stay out there. Mom ordered it built after their last visit.
Auntie Hannah's children are very nice, and are very smart. The two oldest are in Irish dance.


December 12, 2001
Ack! Aisling wrote and told us she is heading out our way! I am so afraid! I already told you how their visits find things broken/stolen/moved/eaten/etc., but I just recalled that I am in fact the owner of very valuable things (mainly, solo dress, school dresses, ghillies, hardshoes, medals, trophy, etc.). Auntie Aisling's children steal from Fisherman's Grove, too! The Grove is our main market place that we get our fish and poultry from. If you want good oysters, go to The Grove! Anyway, Auntie Aisling's youngest son, Alex, stole three Cornish Hens in his overcoat! Why he wanted them, I don't know. Auntie Aisling's middle child Dearbhla, who is two years older than me, stole three orange candy sticks from the market at their last visit. The Grove is not the main grocery store. Market Square is. They have rows of tins and glass jars holding various candies (my favorites! The cherry-flavored suckers!) and this is where Dearbhla stole the orange candy sticks from. But now on a more WebOireachtas-sey note! We had the Light Competition last weekend! It was grand! I danced so well! But I almost never got to participate. You see, Aiobh broke her rib and fractured her arm when she fell that day, and the morning (exactly four hours prior to my competition) Aiobh decided to trip and re-break her arm! Soooo, my parents rushed her to the hospital! Unfortunately, Grand-Da and Grandmother were out on the town that morning and were going to the WebOireachtas that afternoon, so I was home alone. Upon the half-hour mark, I began freaking out, and called my mother on her cell to remind her that, yes, I DO have a WebOireachtas today! Her response? Oh @#$%!!! My poor baby! So, we sped up to Inis, fell out of the car, only to discover that this Oireachtas is like any feis: It was running late. So, with the extra fifteen minutes, I quickly got my solo dress on and ran to my stage. I didn't even have time to hang out with my feis buds! Andrea must have thought I died or something. Anyway, I danced quite nicely, and afterwards, I browsed the vendors and got new shammie buckles (amber fillings - I had yet to believe they existed), five new pairs of poodle socks, a CD of practice music, and Riverdance: Live from New York. Hey, I had been saving my money. Also, Andrea's ever-so-lovely dad called and had a chat with my mom, and the news is...................................REESE, ANDREA AND I ARE GOING TO SHARE A ROOM IN THE HOTEL FOR THE HEAVY ROUND! The rooms are ever-so-plush (jet spas....YUM!)! Keelin and I have my sets narrowed down to King of the Fairies and The Blackbird. Now if only I could pick one!
December 16, 2001
The Heavy Round in the WebOs is today. I believe I should stretch a bit and get in my hardshoes, but its quite early, and my Soft Spikes kept me up (So did Reese and Andrea, but we had fun...the beds are fun to jump on!).
Mom ordered a wig from Irish Breeze in downtown Inis, but it's not made yet! It's been three weeks and no news on whether or not it's complete.
Oops! Mom is calling and Da is getting mad at Aiobh!

December 18, 2001
The Heavy Round went exceptionally well! I danced my Hornpipe with such a faked smile, I thought I'd lose because of that!
But other than that, a piece of duct tape, I discovered, was stuck to my shoe, and it showed. My Da has been contacting the Adjudicator all weekend trying to tell her that it wasn't completely my fault.
Other than that, Keelin and I have decided that I shall be dancing King of the Fairies as my set next weekend. Unfortunately, my family is coming to the WebO too. I'm nervous about that.
Mom has been fixing the house up recently for Christmas and for the family. A few have already arrived like Aunt Cathleen and Uncle Roger, and Uncle Alasdair and Auntie Bridghid and their five kids. Three do Irish dance, and two are ballet dancers.

December 20, 2001
I am writing to you, my diary, from inside our linen closet. Aunt Aisling arrived yesterday with her eight horrible children, and they have been torturing me since then.
I am here with my dance bag and my dresses (and my wig, which arrived just before Aunt Aisling did, thankfully). If they saw my wig, I'd never hear the end of it! "Cáitlin is going bald!" that's what they'd say!
Aunt Aisling's oldest, Tim Andy (who is 19), already has Aoibh and I convinced that our house is haunted by an evil spirit who demands blood!
I am not having the greatest time.
Fi and Seámus are coming home later today. I haven't seen my big siblings for nearly six months!
Seámus will hopefully help me fend off my evil cousins, and send them away. Not all the way away, because Mom and Da wouldn't let me (nor would Aunt Aisling or Uncle Alexander.
Oh no! I hear three of them coming. I have to stop breathing for a second.
That was the three "Gray Sisters" as I call them. Lynagh, Dearbhla and Emma who are 15, 14 and 17.
They are really evil people. Here they come again! I think I'm going to have to find a new hiding place.

December 25, 2001
I have no friends. I am friendless. It's all because of stupid Aunt Aisling's ugly devils for children.
Ah yes, last weekend was Dance Drama and my Set dance (which was King of the Fairies), but right before I was about to do my Set, Andrea ran up to me (with Morrigan behind her, but she wasn't listening). Her hair looked unkempt, and her overall appearance was that of someone who had just been chased by a rabid and ravinous pack of hungry hyenas.
It was at that moment that I remembered my stupid cousins.
They were no where to be seen, and I was in no mood to look for them, because in five minutes I was to get on stage to dance my set.
Andrea looked me dead in the eye, her own were glistening with anger. She was red-faced, and I knew I was about to be yelled at. For what I had no idea.
"Cáitlin! Do you know what your stupid cousins have just done to me?"
"Uh, not really. I was in the bathroom." I played stupid.
"Ha, funny. But your annoying little beasts for cousins have just locked me in a closet."
"Funny. They had me in a closet too, only I wanted to get in." I tried to lighten the mood. I didn't want to dance my Set angry.
"Listen! If Morrigan hadn't rescued me, there would be no way I could have danced my Set, and therefore, first place would be only a huge exaggeration, if they even liked my other dances."
"Uhm - "
"And another thing. It's all your fault that your cousins have done this. YOU brought those slimy creatures."
Now both you and I know, Diary, that my cousins are slimy creatures, but hearing someone blaming me for their evil-doings, made me want to defend them. Yes, defend those slimy things.
"Ex-CUSE me?" Is all I could muster. My mouth was quivering. I didn't want to talk anymore, or I'd break down. She was totally dissing my family.
I turned around then, pulled up my socks, and walked grumpily on stage.
I pounded the Set out for only five seconds. I was so angry I could have just left right then. And I did, for the next second I was on the ground, staring at the floor.
I got back up, sheepishly, and started again. Afterwards, I felt so horrible that I left before Dance Drama, and therefore, I'm not apart of it. I had a good part in the little act, too.
Needless to say, I pounded the first little cousin I got my hand on. It happened to be the ten-year-old who punched Morrigan (she said it was the youngest, but the youngest is Liz, and she's only six and was asleep most of the time) and so I was grounded. I still am.
This has just been so peachy keen.
I hope Andrea's happy.

Later

Since I am grounded, I have nothing to do, and I have more to write. I wasn't in a festive mood when I wrote my last entry, so I forgot to mention what nice thing Reese did for me.
After my horrible Set, I tried to find my parents, but I only found some random aunts and uncles, and I was stressing out beyond belief, and ready to collapse at any moment.
I watched Riana dance her Set, and then I walked to the bathroom and just stared at myself. I tried not to cry for a while, until I just let myself. Tears flooded out. I wanted to kill my cousins.
That's when Reese walked in. She had just danced and was looking mighty tired, but happy. Upon seeing me, she smiled and came over and commented on how well I danced, and how my fall didn't effect anything.
I thanked her.
She asked me what had happened, and I told her. She got really confused, but it didn't matter, because she just kept on commenting on different things.
I dried up my tears and walked out with her to practice a two hand that we both knew.
I grabbed my bag and pulled out my own mix of my favorite songs. I played "The Landlord's Walk" and we had a ball! I danced my slip jig and goofed up my light jig, and did exceptional on my reel. I got a bunch of other dancers who weren't dancing at the moment, to come and dance. So we had this big happy Ceili in front of the Antonio Pacelli booth.
We were far enough away so that the music didn't affect the dancing.
I saw Andrea in the corner watching us. I wanted to invite her, but I was still really angry. As soon as the Ceili stopped, I left, not really the mood to be ridiculous in our "Tell Me Ma" Dance Drama."

December 26, 2001
My best friend Aubrey is visiting! She came as a suprise early this morning from Coupeville! I'm also ungrounded! Mom found out what happened at the WebO, and Aunt Aisling has grounded all of her kids except Liz, the one who was asleep.
Well, that's the only good news. Aubrey and I are alone at the moment. Alone in the woods, the HAUNTED woods! The ones that she and I swore we'd never go into for more than an hour or the síog would get us!
And ever since reading To Kill a Mockingbird, we've been worried about Hot Steams on the deserted road that runs through here.
How did we get out here? Three words: Rabid ravenous hyenas. Namely, Aunt Aisling's kids.
We went out here with some cousins from my other aunts and uncles, but when they decided to go back, Tim Andy and Dearbhla threatened to throw them in the swamp. Needless to say, they ran back quick as lightening.
But Aubrey and I stayed, and here we are. My cousins all took off as soon as we entered the deep part of the forest, so we're alone without food and safe water.
It's probably two o'clock now. It's when Aunt Cathleen would be calling us for tea. She's quite old fashioned in her ways.
But it's really cold out, and it's been raining since last Saturday, and this forest isn't very small. It took Mom and Da three hours to walk through our part of it, the part that I know.
But Aunt Aisling's kids knew this, and so we entered from Peterson's Moor, five miles down the road, into an unfamiliar, but very haunted area of the Great Forest.
The Great Forest covers many parts of the most remote parts of our town.
It's so large we almost make it to Andrea's house. We drove through it once.
But now I just want to stay as far from her house as possible. She changed since Morrigan got back. She's all snobby to me. She probably laughed when I fell, too. Serves me right for trying to be a friend to someone other than Aubrey.
Anyway, it's raining again, and the trees are dripping on you, Diary, plus Aubrey and I are going to find a way out of here.
Deary me. I just remembered this part of the woods is, well, huntable.

Later still:

We're going to die! It's raining again, and we heard more hunter's guns in the distance, and I fell and my leg feels like it's been sliced to the bone.

December 27, 2001
Turns our that Aubrey and I found Old Lady Ludwig's house. She invited us in for tea and cookies, wrapped my leg, and then drove us home.
When we got home, Mom was holding up the results. I had placed fifth. I know why I did. It's because I fell and didn't dance my Set well at all.
And I fell because of Andrea's comments toward me. I just wanted to fall off of the planet. I'm not mad or anything, I'm just really MAD! Not at a my placement, it's very good. Our school got first in the Large Ceili and second in the Small Ceili.
I'm mad because of my cousins. They're leaving in two days, thankfully.
I have to e-mail Andrea her results. I really don't want to because she'll probably think I'm lying or something stupid like that, because she hates me. Oh well. I've got Aubrey.

Later:

I sent the e-mail. I wrote "1st at WebOireachtas, kisses, Cáit." Now, hopefully, she won't be all mad at me. I was nice. I didn't have to write her at all. Nope.
I don't hate her, but I think she hates me. I want to talk to her. Reese thinks I should, but I don't know. She'd probably hang up, and anyway, she's in Ireland, and it's long distance. Mom would freak.

December 27, 2001
Later On:
I called Andrea. I had to. Reese mentioned I should, and I did. I tried to be nice, but I didn't want to. Inside I wanted to just yell at her so much that it would break the eardrum of every person in the room with her.
And yet, I didn't.
No. I let her act all rude to me. Of course, I spoke rudely too, but only as a payback for what she did at the WebO; she caused me to fall and to leave.
She could have told me to yell at my cousins, but instead she yells at them through me. It's not my fault. I swear it's not my fault.
And the worse thing is that Reese is fighting with Andrea now too. Turns out she doesn't think it was my fault, and Andrea, acting stuck up, ended her friendship with Reese as well.
Now all she has is Morrigan, who she fights with constantly anyway.
I'm seeing a pattern.
Well, below is our conversation.

Andrea: Hello?
Me: Hi...it's Cáit. Did you get the news on the WebOireachtas? I sent an e-mail.
Andrea: Yeah. So, um, congrats to you and Reese eh.
Me: Are you happy though? I'd be happy. I'd be so happy that I'd, well, hug one of my cousins.
Andrea: Yeah, sure, I'm happy. I worked really hard to do well at the WebOs. Then I get locked in a closet, then you won't speak to me, then you email me to tell me how well you did at the competition.
Me: How well I did? Now I know what Reese meant.
Andrea: Oh, you've been talking about me then, have you?
Me: No, she simply told me to call you, but be careful. I guess the be careful part slipped my mind because I thought she kidding.
Me: I guess it means that not talking to you at all is best. I thought I'd call because I wanted to make sure you got the e-mail.
Andrea: Well, I did. So you can hang up now.
Me: And tell you that I got fifth. Okay, hanging up now.
And with that, I hung up.

In other news, I got my stitches today where my leg was cut. It was almost cut to the bone, and inside was a rusty piece of something, so I got my shots, and I had to take some medicine that made me sleepy, but other than that, I won't be able to dance in the January Webfeis as early as usual. I'll have to go towards the end to let my leg heal.
Aubrey and I set an evil trap for my cousins that worked like a charm.
My house is huge and scary, you know that. Aubrey and I went to the tower/turret thing on the top, and put the scary figure of a girl (a ghost) in the window, and spread white flour on the flow, making sure not to step in it. It's kind of another way to show that no one was in here or something, so it's not any of us.
Well, we went out in the front yard after I got my stitches, and Aubrey and I pointed up the tower window. It freaked them out, but they were still skeptical, so we raced up to the tower. One look at the ground made Marigold cry, and Lyagh scream! Aoibh had written "Die" in the flour, and took the ghost girl down. Aoibh also made pounding and rattling noises. Tim Andy practically wet himself! It was great!
We didn't tell them. We cleaned it up, in fact, and hid the evidence.
Aunt Aisling and my cousins leave tomorrow!

Later:

Andrea doesn't care. She just doesn't care at all! Sorry about that. My shin is itching horribly.
Anyway, I say Andrea doesn't care because I remember once when she told me that we had gone with some of her friend Tiffany's friends (did that make sense) to the mall, and she had "embarrassed" Tiffany, and Tiffany yelled at her for no real reason. Andrea did the same to Reese and me, and I hope she realizes it.
BAH! My shin just won't stop itching! If only I could take the wrapping off - I need to scratch it!
Anyway, Aoibh just got a new job at Irish Breeze. It's a ten minute drive to Inis. She'll get 10% employee discounts on everything (except solo dresses) in the store! Lucky!
We have a school performance (actually just Prizewinner and Preliminaries) on New Years Eve for the 'First Night' celebration. There will be Highland dancers, ballet, a 'magic' school, storytelling, chess (ew), more dancing, SALSA lessons until midnight (which I plan on taking...they are free!) almost every Irish dance school, and a few Irish bands, too.
I hope Andrea comes home soon so I can talk to her.

December 28, 2001
AOIBH LOUISE MONAGHAN READ MY DIARY! I'll kick her arse, I will! She read my last entry, and has been on the phone all morning with who knows who, and, wait, she just hung up. ACK! She's dialing again! I swear my sister is a slacker. She has an Oireachtas next month which may qualify her for Worlds, and she hasn't practiced an ounce!
Bah! I can't stand my sister!
In good news, my evil cousins (and five of my aunts and uncles and their children) have left this morning. I put itching powder in Marigold's socks, and Aoibh put a dirty magazine in Tim Andy's suitcase. She stole it from this kid at school who is a dirty pervert, so she hit two birds with one stone.
Oh, here comes Aoibh. She'd tried to call Sarah (Andrea's older sister) about results, but they aren't - THEY'VE LEFT FOR AMERICA! SHE'S COMING HOME! Oh CRAP! I must hide in a linen closet again.
We're getting my stitches redone tomorrow. Something is wrong, and my skin is chapped and peeling around them. Like I'm allergic to something.
Any way that I can get out of my house and go somewhere to avoid Andrea, I will certainly do so. I have been purposely trying to find a new route to Inis, dance class, and school, but Mom and Da won't hear of it, and Aoibh laughed at me. She's turning eighteen tomorrow, and thinks she's the queen of the universe. Excuse me, Queen of the Universe.
I'm turning thirteen in January, finally. On the fifth, actually.
Fi and Seámus have been teaching me their dances for Worlds. It'll be Fi's third, and Seámus's fourth Worlds. They've been recalled every time!
Fi's Ceili team qualified this year, and she is very excited because she loves Ceili dancing, and her team won second at Worlds two years ago.

December 29, 2001
I got my stitches fixed this morning. My leg feels better and I got a perscription for a new medicine, just in case my leg is infected, which could be possible.
Andrea is back in the states again. Too bad. It would have been lovely if she had missed the Reception for the awards and the dinner dance.
I think I'm catching a cold. My nose has been stuffy all day, and I coughed a lot this morning.
Juuust perfect. A cold. Just in time for the awards ceremony. Figures. This month has been sooo perfect. It was until the Set dance. Boy, if Andrea hadn't made me so upset, I'm sure I wouldn't have fallen.
Speaking of which, I'm going to call her.

Our Conversation:

Sarah: (Sarah answers) Hello.
Me: Is Andrea there?
Sarah: Yeah, hang on (covers mouth piece) ANDREA! PHONE! Talk fast, I wanna call Jimmy.
Andrea: (Andrea gets on) Hello.
Me: Hi.
Andrea: Hi.
Me: Aoibh said you called. Twice.
Andrea: Yeah, um.
Me: I was at the hospital.
Andrea: Oh, why?
Me: Stitches.
Andrea: Oh. Aoibh said you couldn't come to the phone. I thought you were avoiding me.
Me: Nope. I had to get my stitches redone because something was wrong with them.
Andrea: I didn't know you had stitches. When did you get stitches?
Me: Last week. I fell in the forest and cut my leg.
Andrea: Oh. I hope you're ok.
Me: Why would I avoid you.
Andrea: Why wouldn't you avoid me?! You hate me!
Me: I don't hate you! Who said I hate you. I thought you hated me.
Andrea: I don't hate you! Aoibh told Sarah the WebO results. So I called you to talk. And she said you were avoiding me. And, when you called me in Belfast the other day, why didn't you tell me I was wrong about your email? You couldn't have said I was wrong! Instead, you said maybe you'd be better off not talking to me.
Me: What? Well, maybe if you hadn't sounded like you were about to bite my head off, I would have wanted to talk more. You jump to conclusions.
Andrea: I thought you were calling to show off! I thought you hated me for yelling at you before our sets, and you weren't answering my calls, but then you emailed me with what I thought were your results, and then I thought you called to rub it in! If you'd just said I was wrong!
Me: I did hate you for yelling at me at the sets, because it's not my fault! I'm not responsible for my cousins! I'm younger than half of them! And besides, they'd done that to me a million times.
Andrea: I didn't even mean what I said, though! I'd been in a bloody closet for most of the morning. I only yelled at you because you were there and I needed someone to yell at..
Me: You really made me upset. I didn't even stay for the Dance Drama.
Andrea: I know. And I wanted to apologise, but then you started avoiding me.
Me: Because you have me evil death glares in the Webfeis hall.
Andrea: Aoibh said you were even trying to find a new way to go to school not to have to walk past my house.
Me: Of course. Any way to avoid evil death glares.
Andrea: I was giving you evil death glares because all you guys went and had a Ceili and didn't invite me! And I was mad and I couldn't even talk to you because you probably wouldn't have wanted to listen.
Me: Because you hated me, and the last thing I'd ever want to do is to hang out with someone who hates me.
Andrea: I don't hate you! I never said I did. Me: And besides, I was still upset.
Andrea: Well, are you upset now? Me: A little.
Andrea: Why are you upset?
Me: Because I fell at the WebOireachtas because I was so upset that YOU confronted me so harshly.
Andrea: What?
Me: What do you mean?! I fell. Didn't you see me?
Andrea: Yes. But that's hardly my fault.
Me: I was too upset to concentrate on what the heck my feet were doing. You know what was running through my head? Andrea hates me. She's talking behind my back. She's never liked me, ever! Why would anyone like you, Cáit. Add I fell.
Andrea: I can't believe I'm hearing this. I cannot believe I am hearing this at all.
Me: What now?
Andrea: You know what, Cáitlín Monaghan? Go ahead and hate me. Tell everyone I'm a selfish self centered snob. But don't you dare think you can blame your bad dancing on me.
Me: My bad dancing? My bad dancing?
Andrea: That's what it was! I never heard of a set dance that has the dancer on their butt!
Me: Excuse me, Miss "I won WebOireachtas So I'm the Best", but you ruined my day. And my month. AND my first Oireachtas. My Aunt Aisling is offended as well. And Reese thinks you're just too insensitive.
Andrea: I don't care. Her children locked me in a closet! I almost didn’t even GET to dance.
Me: I got locked in a closet by them too. Multiple times I have. Once overnight I was stuck in a closet. I was only five years old.
Andrea: I don't care!
Me: Well what makes you think I care about you're little incident?
Andrea: I danced my best at the WebOireachtas and I won and you're not going to take that from me. Even if you go on and hate, which you will anyway.
Me: I don't! I think you were being a baby about it. Running up to me and taking out your anger. What makes you think that's the right thing to do? Hmm Cuz it's NOT
Andrea: I know it's not! I'd have apologised but you were avoiding me!
Me: I was avoiding getting yelled at again.
Andrea: And you've been still avoiding me, and I could have apologised that night on the phone, but you hung up!
Me: You told me to.
Andrea: Because I didn't know you weren't calling to show off!
Me: I told you I got fifth! How hard is that to understand! Andrea: And then you hung up! And I didn't get to apologise.
Sarah: (Sarah gets on the phone) Listen, kids, I'm sure your baby fights are super fascinating, but I have to call my boyfriend, so can you make it short?
Andrea: Cáitlín, my sister needs the phone.
Me: Alright. I noticed.
Andrea: Please don't hate me.
Me: I can't promise anything.
Andrea: Well, bye.
Me: Bye.

So that's what Andrea thinks. She thinks I'm a bad dancer. Maybe I am. Maybe I shouldn't have even qualified. Maybe I should just quit altogether. I guess Andrea is the best, and I'm the worst and there is no need to keep at it.
I HATE YOU ANDREA CELLUCCI!!!!!!!!
Later:

Okay, I have been thinking about this for a long time. I think I'm going to tell Andrea I'm going to quit, when we are at the Dinner Dance. Yes, there is a Dinner Dance. I'm NOT excited at all. I don't want to wear a dress because I have a bandage on my shin and it'll look stupid.
And why should I go? This is to honor the dancers, right? Well I'm not good enough. I know Andrea meant what she said. I am a bad dancer. She's always placed higher than me at Webfeisanna, and I started a month before her. I started competing in July, but I didn't place.
There is a pattern here. Am I really that bad? I fell down in front of everyone during my Set. Maybe it wasn't because I was distracted. Maybe I'm clumsy.
I've go to stop thinking about it. I'm crying again.
If I hadn't started Irish dancing, this never would have happened!

December 30, 2001
I suppose that I should have let my anger subside and reconsiter qutting Irish dancer, but I haven't, and I'm not. After all, when someone goes and practically tells it to your face that you're a bad dancer, what else can you do? What else would you want to do? I'm even thinking about not going to the dinner dance tomorrow. It would just give Andrea a chance to hurt me some more.
Not that she doesn't feel hurt. We all are. This whole thing has got to stop. But it can't, because every time there is a glimmer of a chance that we'll be friends again, something is said out of anger - or truth - that hurts us more.
Oh! The phone is ringing. It was Reese.

Here is our conversation:

Reese: Hi!
Me: What's up?
Reese: Nothing much. Actually i was just wondering if you wanted to come over tomorrow morning and go shopping in the city for a dress I called yesterday and your sister said that you weren't even sure if you were even going.
Me: I might not.
Reese: You really should.
Me: Andrea will find something else to say.
Reese: No she won't. Its going to be a big dance you probably won't even see her!
Me: True.
Reese: And who will I hang out with if your not there?
Me: That's also true.
Reese: Besides you have to get your award.
Me: Yes, I know. But we'll all be on stage. I'll see Andrea.
Reese: So? She won't say a word.
Me: I guess I'll go.
Reese: I talked to her today. She called me.
Me: As long as she keeps her big mouth shut and - She did?
Reese: And I stuck up for you and said that she needed to apologize to us. She did but it didn't sound like she meant it.
Me: Thanks. She says that all the time.
Reese: No problem that's what friends are for - I know!
Me: How she wishes she could apologize. Please!
Reese: Anyway I better go soon my long distance phone bill is going to be sky high this month!
Me: Haha. Yes, that's most definitely true.
Reese: But my mom says you can take the 9 o'clock train into the city and we'll pick you up at the station!
Me: Alright! I'll come.
Reese: And she'll take you home when we're done. She's very freaky about traveling on trains at night! I'll see you tomorrow then! I can't wait to go shopping, the city is so much fun!
Me: Hahaha. Alright!
Reese: Bye!
Me: Bye!

Reese is so nice to me. It'll still feel awkard and all at the dinner dance, seeing as how I know I won't avoid Andrea. And besides, I think a little confrontation is needed.

December 31, 2001
I'm getting ready for the WebOireachtas Dinner Dance now. I have my dress on and shoes on, but honestly, I look like an idiot in it. My bandage shows through my tights, and I'm not going without them. They disguise the numerous bruises and bumps on my legs.
I went into town with Reese yesterday. I had a blast looking at dresses, but none of them worked for me. None of them. They were mostly too mature, and a lot were pink or something, that clashed with my hair, and personally, pink just isn't my color. Black was too mature, plus nearly all of them were strapless, and seeing an almost thirteen-year-old in a strapless little black dress, just seems - wrong.
No word from Andrea recently. She hasn't called. She didn't call when I was gone, and Reese says she hasn't called either. Maybe we're officially not friends anymore. Maybe when I pass her on the street, we won't even notice or recognize each other. Maybe we're strangers from now on.
I am still thinking of quitting, though Reese advised me not to - a lot - and I am still thinking of telling Andrea. In fact, that's the first thing I'll tell her.